One of the things I have learned on my path, is to admit when I can't do it all. This is one of those times. Due to a current project, I have not been able to keep up my regular writing routine.
Because I enjoy writing, I know this is only temporary. So, I look forward to connecting with you soon.
Be well. Stay true. And thanks.
]]>I hope you will allow me to share a few highlights....
"People are the solution to the problems that confront us. Technology is not the solution, although it can help." (19)
"Relationships are all there is. Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else. Nothing exists in isolation. We have to stop pretending we are individuals who can go it alone." (19)
"We have to slow down. Nothing will change for the better until we do. We need time to think, to learn, to get to know each other. We are losing these great human capacities in the speed-up of modern life, and it is killing us." (19)
"We are hungry for a chance to talk. People want to tell their story, and are willing to listen to yours." (24)
"If conversation is the natural way that humans think together, what gets lost when we stop talking to each other?" (26)
"... When she tells her story, it begins like all the others: Some friends and I started talking." (27)
"When we listen with less judgment, we always develop better relationship with each other. It's not differences that divide us. It's our judgments about each other that do." (36)
"Oppression never occurs between equals. Tyranny starts with the belief that some people are more human than others." (75)
"One of the easiest human acts is also the most healing. Listening to someone." (88)
My big 3 take-aways?
Inspired? When do you listen? When will you have that conversation?
]]>One of the topics has been reconciliation. Something really grabbed me about this word. One of the many definitions I consulted states that to reconcile is to bring into harmony or to make consistent.
I think that we all must feel a little fragmented at times. Am I right? Do you sometimes feel scattered?
Perhaps I was drawn to this word because it is related to the ideas of integrity and being aligned. I value people and experiences that have a consistency to their nature. I certainly like when there is a sense of harmony. (My boys can attest that their bickering drives me crazy.)
I think that the process of reconciliation brings us back to the truth, to the light. But how exactly, do we get there? While I'm not an expert, I think the first step is to create a quiet physical and mental space to access the person you truly are. Then, I think you need to meditate or pray to consider what is creating a state of disequilibrium. Hopefully, that awareness will lead to some ideas on how to bring all the pieces back together.
Personally, I'm going to test my hypothesis. There is at least one relationship in my life that requires some reconciliation within me. Not totally sure what the outcome will be, but the anxiety related to a past hurt is really only bugging me.
]]>Recently, a local leader shared a very significant experience that she had at an off-site conference. While listening to Howard Schultz’s story “Onward” (the story of Starbucks’ turnaround), he recounted a similar idea. That was when I decided this would be a good theme for a new year’s blog post.
A multi-day off-site conference offers the promise of many things – strategic planning, time for reflection outside of day-to-day pressures, a chance to bring global leaders into one spot to engage, reward and motivate. It can be a struggle for event planners to establish the balance between meaningful and relevant sessions mixed with out-of-the-box learning experiences (that get people out of their seats in a conference room).
So, why not consider joining forces with a local community, charitable or non-profit organization? Can you imagine the impact your group could have when they build a house for a low-income family? Beautify a park? Support the local food bank? Besides doing a good thing for a community, this allows for team-building, time for reflection and idea generation (minds are at rest while people’s hands are busy), and it can boost the company’s reputation with both the public and its employees.
One note to any corporate planner: approach partnerships with non-profit organizations in an open, equal way. Most non-profits are keen and grateful to partner with your company. Until recently, I was unaware of just how much preparation and resources a non-profit organization must bring to the table to partner with a corporation. Through an open discussion between partners who respect one another, I am certain a valuable relationship can be fostered.
]]>As my mind comes back to the logistics of the season, I wonder what this might mean for the grieving family's plans and traditions for this holiday season. Will it be more subdued? Will it be cancelled altogether? I wouldn't dare offer a judgment or suggestion to them, as every person experiences grief differently and it is their personal right to do what feels best for them.
What I will say is that I plan to honour the people we have lost by being more present, more joyful and more grateful for the family and friends I will be seeing this year and the people who have contributed to my ever-so fortunate life.
Blessings to you Rachel. And to you, Max.
]]>As a coach, I love goals. I think that goals can be the building blocks of major life achievements.
However, I have come to believe that the drive to achieve and accomplish can become an obsession. For some, successfully reaching a new level, receiving awards, and advancing can parallel the desire to consume material things.
So, as you think about what goals and dreams you want to reach for, ask yourself why is this important to me? How will this objective serve me (and not others)? Will this objective honour my values?
Also, consider how you want to BE while you're striving to reach your goal. What do you want to be aware of along the way? What do you want to celebrate? After all, the journey offers much more promise then the achievement of a goal.
]]>Want a quick way to feel better? Take 5 minutes and write out 10-15 things you are grateful for. Yes, for a moment you might think you've got nothing going on, but I promise you have far more than you realize.
Here's my gratitude quick list:
Perspective. It's a beautiful thing.
]]>Whether from my nature or a product of my environment, this strength is a part of me. It can be a good thing. It helps me be the manager of a busy family (e.g. remembering that we used the last tortilla wrap this morning, that the boys need to go back to the eye doctor and dentist in January, and ensuring that someone can drive a kid to hockey practice tomorrow). It helps me in my work as I regularly have multiple clients and diverse projects on the go at the same time. It even helps me personally so that I regularly get time just for me, and I remember special dates and events in the lives of my friends and family.
Like any strength, however, there is at least one drawback. It is easy to get caught up in the rigidity of our own routines, structures and paths. We (including me) have to remember the "why" behind what we do. Because that's really what it is about, isn't it? The routine of making your kids' lunches at night helps for an easier, more content morning. The practice of early morning exercise supports your total wellness. That plan you have for your career is going to lead you to the kind of work that will give you a sense of fulfillment. Structures, frameworks, even labels are helpful when they move us towards our objectives and goals. But we (and myself included) have to ensure that we do not forsake the end result, in favour of the framework.
BUT... no framework has all the answers. No structure works now and for the rest of your life. There is never just one right way. Variables change. The world gives us whispers and opportunities, and even challenges, that we had not expected.
So, I ask you to consider two questions.... First, what structures are in my life and for what overall objective or purpose? Second, are they serving me well and most effectively right now?
No one wants to be the person you says "well, I've always done it this way".
]]>Imagine, if you will, that you are on a boat. You are the captain, the leader. To assess your performance, for just a moment look behind you. It is in the wake that you can tell the kind of course you are steering. There are two edges to your wake. The first, are your tasks. Your results. Are they advancing the mission of your organization? Are you meeting the standards being set for you? Now, check out the opposite edge. These are your relationships. What kind of relationships do you have with your constituents (employees, peers, partners, suppliers, etc.)? Do people trust you enough to tell you the truth? How do you treat the people that are in your path?
These are the clear indicators of how you are doing and where you can make improvements. Having trouble finding out how you're doing? SEEK out the information. Have you had a performance appraisal lately? How are your results advancing the organization's strategic plan? On the relational side, ask people. If you fear they won't be honest with you, enlist your coach to ask them. Survey them. A 360 degree approach provides the best information.
So Leader, how are you doing?
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Be careful of your thoughts, because your thoughts become your words.
Be careful of your words, because your thoughts become your actions.
Be careful of your actions, because your thoughts become your habits.
Be careful of your habits, because your thoughts become your character.
Be careful of your character, because your thoughts become your destiny.
What does it mean for you? Where is your sweet spot? And where is your weak spot? I know where I most often fall down and disappoint myself. What about you? What needs to shift? When that change is made, what would it mean to your day? Your life?
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